Thr's noone tat able to understand my feeling.. Even my own mum nv understand me.. She nv understand hw I feel... She only care abt hw she feels n says tat I nv think abt her.. She doesn't knw tat I really love n care for her.. I knw I cnt control my temper n if she really knows abt me vry well, she auld understand y I most of the time nt in the good mood.. I knw my bf lied to me.. Yes, im hurt a lot.. N pls dun add the pain more.. If he lied to me, u dun hav a right to force me to brk wif him... It's my choice for being stupid girl or wat.. I dw to brk up wif him cuz he's the one tat cheer me up when u r nt wif me.. I was rly hurt when I knw u were in tat problem.. U shod knw hw I feel tat time.. Yes, I could smile n say tat I'm alright but I'm not perfectly alright at all.. I tried to control my anger n feeling tat time.. N he was the one who helping me for it.. Hw could I dump him juz cuz of ur own decision tar trying to control me? Do u knw tat u were lie to me n keep all ur past for more than 12 yrs? Haha u think I'm nt hurt? I feel lik I wan to gt out from tiz family.. I'll gt out when it reach the perfect timing.. I dun need anyone in my life.. I dun need my bf at all.. I dun trust anyone anymore..

Welcome myself to my new blog ! xD

It's been a long time since i touch blog. Hehes, MIA ~ Well, let's gt into the topic !

*sigh* wat a sleepless night i gt last night. i dk y i was such in the bad mood. well, actually i knw the reason for it. i dk y did i open his blog n strt to read all the posts from the past few yrs. as a result, i cried the whole night. luckily, my bro was sleeping n i guess he wont knw i was crying :D

to be honest, i dun even knw hw he was in the past. being so mushy? so kind? or etc? seems lik he treat all his girls the same way except me, n i feel lik he treat me much more worse thn his previous girls? he could went out for date, hav fun tgt, n talking wif each other on phone everyday. but me? he nv even cn go out wif me. i nv even see him before. hav fun? hahas, only online gaming n sms? talking wif each other on phone everyday? NO WAY ! i cn calculate hw many times he called me using my fingers.

i was really hurt. i dk y i was reading all the posts so closely thn wat i've done before. n i knw i shldnt do tat cuz it hurts me so badly... getting to knw his past a bit, kinda make me sad n frustated. he cn say all those sweet words to his ex girls, but he only say abt 50% of those words to me? hahas.. n yet he still cn say tat he love me more thn others. he did say tat too in his post to other girl. i feel tat all the guys r the same, no difference AT ALL. I guess in the end they will end up hurting me as usual :)

he doesnt knw i hav new blog n doesnt knw tat i was crying last night. he made me disappointed many times. i could only smile, n keep all my feelings inside. ya, tat's all wat i've to do anyway.